Just cropdusted the office
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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