We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
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they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
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It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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