I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
