i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
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i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
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Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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