The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize