U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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