sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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