Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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