I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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