Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My ass is underappreciated
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Randomize
