She's JV to your varsity
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
