We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
