he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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