He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
he fucked my hip out of place.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize