you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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