I bet he comes in French.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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