Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize