Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
