Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
