Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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