It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You are a genius and a whore.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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