so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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