Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
