I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
