I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Sponge bath it is.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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