gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
