Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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