Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize