I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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