After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pop tarts are not kleenex
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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