what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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