The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize