Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night

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(215): May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night http://tfl.nu/fpxb

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.

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(215): You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid. (215): While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here. http://tfl.nu/jz3m

Replies (17) Good night (464) Bad night (2302)
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(630): View more from Illinois

Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.

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(630): Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way. http://tfl.nu/v52c

Replies (63) Good night (3268) Bad night (1182) Order T-Shirt
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(757): View more from Virginia

So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof

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(757): So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof http://tfl.nu/xt5p

Replies (4) Good night (3754) Bad night (764) Order T-Shirt
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(410): View more from Maryland

a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out

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(410): a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out http://tfl.nu/89tu

Replies (40) Good night (1408) Bad night (7032) Order T-Shirt
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Maybe he just has a boisterous penis

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(203): Maybe he just has a boisterous penis http://tfl.nu/s2rt

Replies (17) Good night (3305) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.

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(847): I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night. http://tfl.nu/upkg

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice

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(920): its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice http://tfl.nu/sbu6

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(503): View more from Oregon

And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....

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(503): And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container.... http://tfl.nu/xfht

Replies (16) Good night (1490) Bad night (3196) Order T-Shirt
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(616): View more from Michigan

No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....

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(616): No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet.... http://tfl.nu/e90k

Replies (3) Good night (1878) Bad night (1482) Order T-Shirt
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(954): View more from Florida

Promise me you won't have sex in my room

(248): View more from Michigan

I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try

(248): View more from Michigan

Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.

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(954): Promise me you won't have sex in my room (248): I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try (248): Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge. http://tfl.nu/lf7v

Replies (2) Good night (1192) Bad night (366)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.

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(973): If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will. http://tfl.nu/voi6

Replies (2) Good night (859) Bad night (529) Order T-Shirt
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(936): View more from Texas

I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.

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(936): I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining. http://tfl.nu/kdvr

Replies (2) Good night (1257) Bad night (325) Order T-Shirt
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(410): View more from Maryland

the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?

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(410): the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right? http://tfl.nu/bfic

Replies (1) Good night (548) Bad night (217) Order T-Shirt
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.

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(918): I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated. http://tfl.nu/rg2y

Replies (2) Good night (771) Bad night (219)

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