bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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