I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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