how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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