If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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