Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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