Are we in a gay sports bar?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
