I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
