There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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