But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
