I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize