pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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