shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You were trust falling into bushes
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
