Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
