physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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