no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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