Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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