well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
It's just like the Real World with babies
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
