Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
